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从劳伦斯及其作品《儿子与情人》看恋母情结

abstract
in his theory of psychoanalysis, freud introduced the term “oedipus complex” also called “mother fixation” according to the ancient greece and rome mythology in which oedipus who killed his father and married his mother to designate a boy’s strong love for and attachment to his mother and consequent jealousy and hatred towards his father. unconsciously the boy may even nourish a desire to kill his father and marry his mother. this is a crucial stage in the normal psycho-sexual developmental process, and those who fail to pass the stage will be unable to establish a normal man-woman relationship when they grow up. after introducing the origin and understanding of mother fixation, the thesis points out that d. h. lawrence, together with his works, especially sons and lovers, is a specific evidence of the oedipus complex. in the traditional chinese family culture,combining with some of the special relationship of the sons and mothers and the conflicts between the mothers and daughters-in-law they reveals the phenomenon and essence of mother fixation. the thesis firstly explains the understanding and analyzes the study status of mother fixation at home and abroad. secondly, it gets evidence of mother fixation from the lifetime of lawrence. finally, it analyzes the work sons and loves. with the depiction of wars between the dramatis personas mrs. morel and the lovers of her son paul, psychological dependence and the abnormal love of the mother and son, the ambivalence and the tragedy of the dramatis personas, it reveals to us that how mother fixation injure the body and soul of people.
key words
mother fixation; psychological dependence; specific evidence; abnormal love
 
摘 要
弗洛伊德在其精神分析学说中根据古希腊罗马神话俄狄浦斯王子杀父娶母而提出“俄狄浦斯”亦称“恋母情结”这个概念,认为三岁至五岁的男孩会自然而然地恋母嫉父,并在潜意识中存着杀父娶母的欲望;不能顺利度过这一阶段的男孩成年之后往往难以确立正常的恋爱或夫妻关系。wWw.11665.COM本文旨在细述对恋母情结的来源和对恋母情结的理解后,指出20世纪英国作家劳伦斯及其作品,尤其是《儿子与情人》,便是“恋母情结”的有力佐证,并从劳伦斯的生平和这部作品中找出事实与证据,结合中国传统家庭文化中某些特殊的母子关系、婆媳的纷争与矛盾关系中揭示了恋母情结的现象和本质。本论文先是通过对恋母情结的理解和分析并阐述了国内外对恋母情结的研究状况;然后从作者劳伦斯生平事迹找出其身上恋母证据;最后分析作品《儿子与情人》,通过描述作品中由恋母情结所引发的战争,主人公莫瑞尔夫人和儿子保罗之间的心理依赖和畸恋,作品主人公的矛盾心理及主人公的悲剧来揭示恋母情结对人身心的伤害。
关键词
恋母情结;心理依赖;有力佐证;畸恋
 
introduction
mother fixation was a sensitive subject in the literature world that research about it was not much; freud was also lack of specific evidence for it that was posed by him. in the 20th century, the work sons and lovers aroused a great sensation in the literature world that people put their attention to mother fixation. most people believed that it was a strong evidence for freud’s theory-mother fixation.
in the work sons and lovers, mrs. gertrude morel, the mother, was a woman of strong character and refinement. her husband was a miner who drank heavily and he was irresponsible which often led to terrible quarrels in the family. paul morel grew up in such a miserable setting. the mother lavished her love on him and determined to save him from the shadow of the coal mine. but when he was in love with miriam, mrs. morel was afraid that she might lose him so she did her best to come between them. finally, the two lovers had to divorce from each other. a second attachment, to clara, gradually fizzled out, too clearly, both failures were caused by the possessive mother, it was not only until the mother died that the son began to find for his true love earnestly. it is one of the greatest autobiographical novels of the last century and it is loved far and wide in the world.
although lawrence denied this, his family background was so like the dramatic persona paul’s. he was in love with the wife of a professor; the woman of three children was 6 years older than lawrence made up for the loss of his mother. from lawrence and his work sons and lovers we should learn something about it.
 
 
ⅰ.the understanding of mother fixation
a. the origin of mother fixation
in one of the ancient greece and rome mythologies there was a prophecy that the new prince of oedipus realm would be the person who kill his father and married his mother, after hearing the prophecy, the oedipus king decided to dissent his son to the desolate mountain. luckily, the young prince was rescued and brought up by a shepherd and was sent to oedipus realm country as the son of oedipus realm. the prince did a lot of charitable deed that the people regarded him as a hero and then supported him as the king of oedipus realm. becoming the king of oedipus realm, the young king married the queen of oedipus realm. one day he knew the truth that the queen was his mother and his father had been killed by him as a passenger. realized this, the young oedipus king dug out his eyeballs and then led a vagrant life. according the story, the austrian psychologist freud had posed the theory of oedipus which also called mother fixation.
b. analysis of mother fixation
  in the ancient greece and rome mythology, the prince killed his father and married his mother; people believe that the phenomenon of incest was ignorant. but there was no doubt that in the western feudal dynasty such phenomenon was common. because of the desire of right and wealth, the incest was inevitable. mother fixation was on the basis of instinctual impulse, which was original essence. with the development of human society, mother fixation has a great change and it has developed from instinctual impulse into psychological dependence and love. there are several kinds of abnormal love: father fixation, mother fixation, brother fixation and sister fixation. in our daily life, mother fixation is the most common phenomenon. we can see that in our daily life the boy children always depend on his mother, also, in the mother’s eyes their children are little children forever. many of the young children have a deep dependence on their mothers on psychology, even when they grow up. they are lack of their own judgment or thought. they do what their mothers ask them to and don’t do what their mothers don’t allow. what kinds of schools, work and wives they will choose not are not decided by themselves but their mothers. they believe that their mothers are the ones love them most and can be relied on that they don’t want to leave their mothers and they desire to stay with their mothers forever. in opposite, the mothers put most of their attention to their children. they try their best to protest their children. they decide everything for their children because they believe that they know what their children need. in their children’s life no body can take the place of their mother. gradually they want to control the activity and thought of their children. the fever love will make the mothers have such a sense that they are afraid of losing their children. they prevent their son making so many friends especially female friends. they even interfere in their sons’ love and marriage. in their hart, they wish that their sons never leave them and marry other women. we can define it as selfish love but in most occasion it can be regarded as abnormal love, mother fixation ,such kind of love not only distort the normal love between mothers and sons but also affect their life, especially the happiness of the future life of the sons.
c. foreign studies of mother fixation
after freud had posed the theory of mother fixation according to the ancient greece and rome mythology that oedipus killed his father and married his mother which was on the basis of core of instinctual impulse, many western psychologists fixed their eyes on mother fixation. many of them did not agree with the idea of freud because he could not provide specific evidence for his theory. some of the psychologists agreed with freud, but they believed that motherfixation was not a common phenomenon because they focused on biological research, in their opinion, mother fixation was just a phenomenon of incest happened by chance. evidently, they had a misunderstanding of mother fixation. with the development of human civilization, the core of mother fixation has developed from instinctual impulse into psychological dependence and love. incest and parricide are every rare. in 20th century, the publication of sons and lovers and the experience of the author d.h.lawrence had provided specific evidence to support the theory of mother fixation and it was further to reveal the essence of mother fixation. although d.h.lawrence himself denied the subject of mother fixation of his work, we can get strong evidence from his work sons and lovers.
d. domestic studies of mother fixation
in the chinese traditional culture, people regarded the family value importantly. in the traditional culture of chinese family, the sons and their wives live with their parents and the daughters –in-law will come to her husbands’ family. the conflicts between the mother and daughters-in-law are every common. as we know, the chinese principles of family piety is a kind of traditional morality that the sons and daughters present a tribute to their parents, especially the sons and mothers have deep feeling with each other. the sons always listen to their mothers’ words and follow their counsels while the mothers regarding her son as her core of life. once the wives of the sons come between them the peace of the family will break. the mothers will have such a sense that their daughters-in-law will take their sons away from them that something abnormal appear. then the mothers will make something difficult for their sons’ wives and they will slander theirdaughters-in-law before their sons. in most situations, the sons will stand with their mothers, against their wives, and then the family conflicts appear due to mother fixation.
ⅱ.d.h.lawrence
 
a. the experience of d.h.lawrence

   d.h.l was born in miner’s family of england in 1885.his father was a totally illiterate miner and his mother , a primary school teacher who was born in a noble family was a woman of strong character and refinement. the broken marriage of d.h.lawrence’s parents led to an unlucky family. growing up in a poor and broken family, the young lawrence was physically weak and full of illness. he had a deep feeling with his mother which was different from normal one. lawrence was a literature genius that he started to publish his works from 1906.in 1913 his most great work sons and lovers published and the novel aroused strong reverberates in the literature world which established his position in the literature history. in 1912, lawrence got acquainted with the wife of a professor, frieda weekly, who was 6 years older than lawrence, a mother of three children. every soon, they got love with each other and eloped to german, from then on, they led a vagrant life until he died. in 1930, lawrence died in the south of france. during his lifetime, lawrence published lots of works, such as women in love, rainbow, sons and lovers and so on, which are loved far and wide in the world.
b. the witness of mother fixation
in the 19th century of england, the people were divided into three stratums. they were the upper class, the middle class and the lower class. people from different classes had different goals and they were treated differently. so that families of equal standing were regarded seriously. lawrence’ father, the miner of course from the lower stratum was ill iterated and choleric with a bad temper .he got acquainted with lawrence’s mother, a primary school teacher who was from the middle class. the woman was every pride and she always complained that her husband was vulgar person without any ambition and regretted that it was miserable to marry him. the unlucky marriage was born which was the basis factor of abnormal love .the arrogant woman put much attention to her son that she want to realize her dream to be the upper class. lawrence was her psychological dependence. the son of the miner’s family grew up under the shelter of his mother, and engendered the abnormal love which was different from the common human emotion. after the death of his mother, lawrence terminated the engagement with his fiancé. no soon later, lawrence got acquainted with fried weekly and fell in love with her. at last, lawrence and fried weekly eloped, which was regarded as the strong evidence of mother complex under lawrence because frieda, the wife of a professor and a mother of three children who was 6 years older than lawrence and made up for the mother fixation of lawrence. such love was reviled by people because it had distorted the moral love.
ⅲ. sons and lovers
a. main contents of sons and lovers
paul morel was born in a miner’s family that his father mr. morel was a totally illiterate miner and his mother, gertrude was primary school teacher who was born in a good old burgher family, famous independents who had fought with colonel hutchinson, and, who remained stout congregationalists. moreland gertrude got acquainted at a dancing party, sooner they fell in love with each other and got married. but their marriage was a failure. quarrels between the young couple never stopped because of different temperaments and behavior habits. more was a rough man without any ambition and gertrude was an elegant and honorable woman with a great ambition that was the origin of their failure marriage .gradually, poverty and discord was the theme of the family.
william, paul’ older brother was a bright and capable boy and he got a job in england, became the economic prop of the family .unluckily, the young man had a mortal disease and died. the younger brother of paul, arthur was a playboy that did not engage in honest work and joined the army without any thinking. paul, the only boy at home, became the only hope of his mother, gertrude. she tried her best to raised him and hope that one day he could get rid of poverty of miners and made up for her failure marriage. paul did not disappoint his mother that he won credit for her. his drawing did not only win the prize but also sold for a good price. all of these he did was to please his mother and made her proud.
the first girl fell in love with paul was miriam who was from the willey farm. they held the common in goals especially in literature and painting. they really matched well. unfortunately, the love did not last long. their date was interfered with by his mother because she was afraid of losing his son. paul realized that his faithful love belonged to his mother. when he knew that the date with miriam had hurt his mother he regretted his behavior and could not bear, so that he decided to separate from miriam. the second woman in paul’s life was clara who was a married woman. because of not getting along well with his husband, clara separated with her husband with a legal divorce. clara was a wildly enthusiastic and sexy woman that paul was attracted by her fascination. however, the emotion in paul’ heart belong to his mother .the people he loved most was his mother not the sexy woman. the love also ended not long. the love of paul and his mother became mother complex from the love between mothers and sons. because of endless conflicts, mrs. morel was mentally and physically exhausted that she died of tumor at the end. from then on, paul got rid of the shackles of his mother and led an independent life.
b. mother fixation
1. wars
as we know, it is a tragedy for a woman to marry a wrong man, so was gertrude .because of a sudden passion, the girl, gertrude from a rich and powerful family married the poor miner. when the passion disappeared she found the man was very rough and he could not be relied on .the endless quarrels made her dream broken that she lavished her love on her second son, paul, after the death of the oldest son. there was so much hope on her son that she wanted to control his son including behavior and soul, so that he would never turn the back on her and went with another girl.

once there were two girls appeared in paul’s life, then the wars broke. the first war was between gertrude and miriam. gertrude realized that miriam was a formidable enemy who would deprive her son from her. as she knew his son had been in love with the girl who was every young and beautiful. the most important thing was that the boy and the girl found each other congenial and held the same idea in common, especially in the art world. they could communicate with each other in their minds, of which gertrude could not do. so when paul was late for home because of the data with miriam, mr. morels was every angry and described miriam as “one of those who will want to suck a man’s soul out till he had none of his own left.” although she did not fight with miriam directly, the war was very acute. she inflicted the pressure on her son and shrew her hate of miriam and afraid of losing her son before paul. that was a mental war. the pressure really made paul mad because when his mother was upset he would fell remorse for her and tortured very much. towards miriam, she treated her coolly when miriam came to visit her family sometimes; all the members and friends of the morel’s family who followed mrs. morel kept distance from miriam and isolated the girl. as to the obstruction, miriam just sneered at paul because she did not know why his mother disliked her and paul just followed his mother. there was no doubt that miriam would be defeated.
another war broke in mrs. morel and clara. mrs. morel definitely knew that she would be the winner of the war because she was sure that her son would be tied of the clara. after the first visit clara to paul’s family morel mrs. found that clara had something attracted to paul. clara was a passionate and sexy woman, of which was most attracted to paul, a mature woman. but in mrs. morel’s mind, clara could not keep the passion of paul because she was a vulgar woman without deep thought that she could not master the soul of paul and paul should throw away his soul for this flippant traffic of triviality with clara, even clara had a husband. she was just waiting her son back. clara herself also realized this, although paul’s mother treated her friendly but it was cool in the old woman’s deep hart. she knew that they have to part sooner or later, even if they married, and were faithful to each other, still he would have to leave her, went on alone, and she would only have to attend to him when he came home. she could not master the hart of paul because she did not know that paul’s hart belong to his mother not any other woman. clara was the loser in the war.
2. abnormal love
gertrude, the pride woman who was from the rich and powerful family married the miner without thinking carefully. the dream of the young girl was to marry a good man, who was elegant, humors and enthusiastic with great ambition. so when she found that morel was just the opposite her dream was broken and she looked for another people who would realize her dream. the death of her oldest son made her despaired until she rebuilt her hope on her second son, paul, who won much credit for her. the life of gertrude was full of sunshine and hope again. she tried her best to praise paul to be a manly man.
her love just liked a chain locking on the neck of paul. when paul fell in love with miriam mrs. morel obstructed the progress of the emotion because she did not allow any other woman to deprive her son from her. mrs. morel did not only control the behavior of paul but also the mentalities of paul that the boy’s hart only belong to his mother.
in the novel, we can see that paul deeply loved his mother that he obeys what his mother said and did what his mother wished him to. during his life, all he did were to please his mother. when he was a child, he walked all day, went miles and miles to look for blackberries which his mother liked, rather than own himself beaten and came home to his mother’s empty handed. when he was away from home, he looked forward to get home earlier because he knew that his mother was alone and waiting his back. in paul’s eyes, his mother was an elegant, undisturbed and beautiful young girl. every night, he would send his mother to bed and kissed her for good night. after the death of his older brother, william, his family ran into a predicament. the expenditure of the family was larger and larger while the family lived with the wage of 26 ponds of the miner, his father. in order to help his mother to manage the household, paul got a job in nottingham and offered his mother his wages.

it was undutiful that paul was a mourning son, but his main purpose was to help his mother. as to his father, he stood with his mother to be opposed to him, even he hated his father. when his father quarreled with his mother he even wanted to take the place of his father. he believed that his father mismatched his mother and there was no love in their marriage. once he talked to clara about love:“love  is a dog in the mager”. the situation just liked his parents’ marriage because even if his mother did not love his father anymore or hated him extremely, their marriage still continued and his mother would never leave his father. his words hinted to us that paul had regarded his father as his rival of love; also we can see that paul replaced his father and protest his mother. the love of the son and the mother was blameless, but it gradually developed into a kind of abnormal love, mother fixation. we can get the evidence from the novel, once a time, after quarreling with her husband, mrs. morel despaired and complained to his son that she never had a husband, a true husband. after hearing this, paul detested his father very much even he wanted to kill his father, at the same time, he deeply realized that his mother did not only nee d a good son but also a idea husband, and then he could not help touching the hair of his mother and kissing his mother’s neck, of which was the strong evidence of mother fixation.
the abnormal love had affected paul’s life and thought. mrs. morel became the core of his dream and life. his mothers interfered again and again in his love and scold miriam.
paul was in a dilemma as to continue to get along with miriam or separate from her. once he thought that it would made his mother sad he was full of self-reproach and remorse. finally, paul decided to divorce from miriam. just as what miriam said, paul was a child, a four years old child that paul did not have his own judgment of thought under the protection of his mother. what he did was to please his mother that once he went against his mother wished he would self-examine and mended his way. though his second attachment without the direct interference of his mother, it gradually fizzled out because paul could not concentrate himself on any other person except his mother. once he said to clara that he planted to go abroad with his mother and depended on each other from then on. in paul’s mind, his mother was his companion in the future but not his lover, maybe there was no a love in his lifetime if his mother was still alive. when he got the truth that his mother had a tumor and was being died, the queer feeling went over him, as if the entire sunshine had gone out of him, and it was all shadow. when his mother died, paul even wanted to go with his mother.
3. conflicts
in the novel, there were several complicated conflicts in the leading characters. as we knew, the novel was about the love between gertrude and her son and paul and his two lovers. the most prominent conflict was in paul and his mother. with the complicated psychology, paul had deep feeling with his mother. when his attachment with miriam led to the objection of his mother, he regretted very much and could not help but obey his mother’s wishes. at the same time, the interference of his mother made him annoyed and detested and sometimes he would do something to hurt to his mother intentionally. once he was late for home again because he had sent miriam home and walked long distance, his mother was very angry and scold him. paul responded that he was old enough to decide what he liked and do what he wanted to. he knew that his words hurt his mother but his hart was delighted because he vented his anger. maybe it was a kind of reprisal for the controlling of his mother. another example was that paul’s mother complained that paul was absorbed by miriam and never let him a man. paul told his mother that he liked to talk to miriam. his mother could not understand why paul could not talk to her. paul said that they were at the same age and his mother was not so young that he could had his thoughts sifted through his mother’s mind and she was not his companionship. he knew that his response was the great revenge to his mother. the contradictable psychology came into the climax. when he got the news that his mother had a tumor he was full of fear that he could not believed that his mother was leaving him. during the last life time of his mother paul made his mother take an overdose of morphine which accelerated the death of his mother. although his purpose was to accelerate the suffering of his mother, it was a vicious idea. had been tied on to his mother for a long time, paul knew that he could never to be a complete person unless his mother died. so the death of his mother made him free. the abnormal love was inevitably crazy and it led to the abnormal psychology.
the second conflict was in paul and miriam. miriam was the first love of paul and their emotion was innocent. paul loved the girl but sometimes he hated her very much especially when their contact made his mother sad he would do something to raven to miriam. when his friends and family disliked her and snubbed her, he stood with them .once his mother and clara had a vicious talk about miriam he criticized them and paid his sympathy to miriam. that was a complicated conflict. as to clara, the passionate fascinating woman interested paul’s attention that he nearly got mad. his mother also treated her friendly, but paul never belonged to the woman. his hart was only belong to his mother that he was not a complete man and he could not consent rated on other women. he annoyed that clara did not belong to him and did not loved him completely. how contradictable the abnormal man was.
4. tragedy
there was no winner at the end of the story .we also can definite that the novel ended with a tragedy. in the novel, the greatest loser was the elegant and arrogant woman mrs. morel because the saddest thing for a woman was to marry a wrong man. the broken marriage was her first failure. it was undoubted that gertrude was loser of marriage. of course, her husband mr. morel was also a loser of marriage and family. the death of the oldest son who won so much credit for her did not brought mrs. morel the tremendous will but the broken dream .although she defeated miriam and clara in the wars, mrs. morel became mentally and physically exhausted and got a tumor and soon died after continuous confliction. it was the tragedy of mrs. morel.
because of interference and control of his mother, paul was deep in the wars of soul and sensory feeling that he could not own complete love and gave up his love at last. when he was in love with miriam and clara his body and mind were divided into two parts that his mind was fixed on his mother while his body with his lovers. it was undoubted that paul was a loser of love. the most unlucky thing was that he lost his mother at last. without his mother, paul almost lost his goal and led a vagrant life abroad.
another loser was miriam; the sensate girl was looked downed upon by her lover paul and abandoned by him.
the last loser was clara, the married woman who had a broken marriage, was pensioned in love with paul and could not escape from the love failure. at the end, clara came back to her husband and recovered her life.
all the failure was due to the abnormal love, mother fixation. it had distorted the emotion of the mothers and sons and breached the moral principle of human being. it did not only harm the body and mind of a person but also destroyed the family. i think we should learn something from it and pursue normal love.
 
conclusion
although mother fixation was a sensitive subject in the literature world that people seldom refer to. it exists in the society as a common phenomenon that it has distorted the soul of mothers and sons, even damaged the family, which also obeys the ethics of human being. as to the author of sons and lovers, d.h.lawrence, mother fixation made him so blind that he did not take care of the moral principles and did not know that he had come to the woman’s family and left it broken. the novel sons and lovers also ended with a tragedy with the death of being mentally and physically exhausted of mrs. moreland the failure of paul’s love.
in our daily life, mother fixation is a common phenomenon, even if many people do not want to mention it or they do not accept the definition of mother fixation. the son who has mother fixation is lack of his own thoughts and enterprising spirit because he believes that his mother is his sanctuary and sunshine that never declines. even when he gets married, his mother is the only person he can rely on not other person. so when there is conflict in his mother and wife he will stand with his mother, go against his wife. as to the mother who has mother fixation lavishes her lover upon her son, she controls his behavior and thoughts that she wishes that her son will never go against her. the son is her everything that she is afraid of losing him. as in china, most of the family conflict cause between the mothers and the daughters-in-law. one of the most important reasons is to fight for the domination of the husbands or sons. once the daughters-in-law come to the family, the mothers will have a sense of tension that the daughters-in-law will take their place to love or control their sons that they are losing their sons. gradually, the mothers will do something difficult for the daughters-in-law and say something to slander them before their sons, and then the family conflict arouses and the tragedy appears. in order to create a happy life and a harmonious society, we should pay our attention to mother fixation and deal with it well because mother fixation is a kind of abnormal human beings’ love and we should pursue normal love.
 

 
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