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Gregorys iPhone Contract老妈的iPhone家规

原文作者:janelle burley holfman

dear gregory,
  merry christmas! you are now the proud owner of an iphone. hot damn1)! you are a good and responsible 13-year-old boy and you deserve this gift. but with the acceptance of this present comes rules and regulations. please read through the following contract. i hope that you understand it is my job to raise you into a well-rounded2), healthy young man that can function in the world and coexist with technology, not be ruled by it. failure to comply3) with the following list will result in termination4) of your iphone ownership.
   1. it is my phone. i bought it. i pay for it. i am loaning it to you. aren't i the greatest?
   2. i will always know the password.
  3. if it rings, answer it. it is a phone. say hello; use your manners. do not ever ignore a phone call if the screen reads "mom" or "dad". not ever. [论文网]
   4. hand the phone to one of your parents promptly5) at 7:30 pm every school night & every weekend night at 9:00 pm. it will be shut off for the night and turned on again at 7:30 am. if you would not make a call to someone's landline6), wherein7) their parents may answer first, then do not call or text. listen to those instincts and respect other families like we would like to be respected.
   5. it does not go to school with you. have a conversation with the people you text in person8). it's a life skill. half days, field trips9) and after school activities will require special consideration.
   6. if it falls into the toilet, smashes on the ground, or vanishes into thin air10), you are responsible for the replacement costs or repairs. mow a lawn, babysit, and stash11) some birthday money. it will happen; you should be prepared.
   7. do not use this technology to lie, fool, or deceive another human being. do not involve yourself in conversations that are hurtful to others. be a good friend first or stay the hell out of the crossfire12).
   8. no porn13). search the web for information you would openly share with me. if you have a question about anything, ask a person—preferably me or your father.
   9. turn it off, silence it, and put it away in public. especially in a restaurant, at the movies, or while speaking with another human being. you are not a rude person; do not allow the iphone to change that.
   10. do not send or receive pictures of your private parts or anyone else's private parts. don't laugh. someday you will be tempted to do this despite your high intelligence. it is risky and could ruin your teenage/college/adult life. it is always a bad idea. cyberspace is vast and more powerful than you. and it is hard to make anything of this magnitude14) disappear—including a bad reputation.

11. don't take a zillion15) pictures and videos. there is no need to document everything. live your experiences. the

y will be stored in your memory for eternity.
   12. leave your phone home sometimes and feel safe and secure in that decision. it is not alive or an extension of you. learn to live without it. be bigger and more powerful than fomo—fear of missing out.
   13. download music that is new or classic or different than the millions of your peers that listen to the same exact stuff. your generation has access to music like never before in history. take advantage of that gift. expand your horizons.
   14. keep your eyes up. see the world happening around you. stare out a window. listen to the birds. take a walk. talk to a stranger. wonder without googling.
   15. you will mess up16). i will take away your phone. we will sit down and talk about it. we will start over again. you and i, we are always learning. i am on your team. we are in this together.
   it is my hope that you can agree to these terms. most of the lessons listed here do not just apply to the iphone, but to life. you are growing up in a fast and ever-changing world. it is exciting and enticing17). keep it simple whenever possible. trust your powerful mind and giant heart above any machine. i love you. i hope you enjoy your awesome new iphone. merry christmas!
   1. 这是我的手机。我付钱买的。我现在把它借给你用了,我是不是很伟大?
  2. 手机密码必须要让我知道。
  3. 如果电话铃声响了,就一定要接听,因为这是一部电话。接起电话要说“你好”,要有礼貌。永远不要因为来电显示是“妈妈”或者“爸爸”就故意不接。永远不要这样做。
   4. 周一至周五晚上7:30、周末晚上9:00准时把手机交给我或你爸。我们会把手机关机,到第二天早上7:30再开机。如果你不愿意给某个朋友家的座机打电话,因为他的父母可能会先接起电话,那就不要打,也不要用手机给他发短信。要听从自己的直觉,尊重别人的家人,就好像我们希望得到别人的尊重那样。
   5. 手机不能带到学校。与那些你用短信联系的人面对面地聊聊天,因为这是一种生活技能。如遇到只上半天课、外出参观学习以及有课外活动等情况,可另行考虑。
  6. 如果手机掉进厕所、摔到地上或是不翼而飞,你得承担更换零件的费用或负责维修。你可以修剪草坪、替别人看孩子或者把一部分生日礼金存起来。这样的事难免发生,你应当做好准备。
   7. 不要利用这个高科技产品说谎、愚弄或者欺骗别人。不要在电话里说一些伤害他人的话。首先要做一个良友,或者干脆远离争端。
  8. 远离色情内容。用手机上网时只能搜索和浏览那些可以坦然与我分享的信息。如果你对任何事情有疑问,可以找个人问问——最好是问我或者你爸。
  9. 在公共场合要把手机关闭,设成静音,并收起来放好,尤其是在餐厅、电影院或者与另一个人交谈的时候。你不是一个无礼的人,不要让iphone改变这一点。
  10. 不要发送或接收你或者其他任何人身体私密部位的图片。不要笑。聪慧如你,有一天也会被诱惑去做这样的事。这有很大的风险,可能会毁掉你中学、大学乃至成年后的生活。这永远是个坏主意。网络空间浩瀚无边,其力量远比你强大,你很难让任何诸如此类的大事不留痕迹——包括坏名声。
   11. 不要无休止地拍照和录像。没有必要把一切都记录下来。要用心体验生活,这些生活经历将会在你的记忆中永存。

12. 有的时候可以不带手机出门,并且决定这么做时要心无挂碍,不要觉得不安。手机不是活物,也不是你身上多长出来的东西。要学会抛开手机生活。不要做那种fomo,总是生怕自己错过了什么,要让自己的内心更强大。
   13. 下载一些新潮的、古典的或者与众不同的音乐,不要像你的无数同龄人那样全都听一模一样的歌。你们这一代人有着史上无人能及的便利条件,可以接触各种各样的音乐。好好利用这个优势,开阔你的眼界。
   14. 不要总盯着手机,抬起头来。留意你周围发生的事情,看看窗外,听听鸟鸣,散散步,和陌生人说说话。保持一颗好奇之心,但不要总用谷歌寻找答案。
  15. 有一天你会把生活搞得一团糟。那时我会收回你的手机。我们会坐下来谈心,然后再从头开始。你和我,我们都在不断学习。我是站在你这边的“队友”,让我们共同面对。

  1. hot damn: [表示惊喜或高兴地尖叫]好哇;万岁
  2. rounded [?ra?nd?d] adj. (在兴趣、能力等方面)发展全面的,多方面的
  3. comply [k?m?pla?] vi. 遵从;服从
  4. termination [?t??(r)m??ne??(?)n] n. 结束,终止
  5. promptly [?pr?mptli] adv. 准时地
  6. landline [?l?n(d)?la?n] n. 座机
  7. wherein [we?r??n] adv. 在那时;在那种情况下
  8. in person: 亲自;当面
  9. field trip: 参观学习;旅行学习。在英国和新西兰,field trip又称school trip,指学校组织的短途旅行,目的通常是使学生离开平时的学习环境去其他地方参观学习、观察大自然、收集标本等。
   10. vanish into thin air: 不知去向;消失得无影无踪
  11. stash [st??] vt. 储藏;藏匿(金钱等)
  12. crossfire [?kr?s?fa??(r)] n. (言词、意见等的)激烈交锋
  13. porn [p??(r)n] n. (= pornograph) 色情(或淫秽)作品(如书刊、图片、影片等)
  14. magnitude [?m?ɡn?tju?d] n. 重要,重大
  15. zillion [?z?lj?n] adj. 无限数的
  16. mess up: 把……弄乱
  17. enticing [?n?ta?s??] adj. 引诱的,有吸引力的
  18. xoxo: 亲亲抱抱(用于书信或短信结尾,表示问候。其中x表示kiss,o表示hug)
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